I am blessed to be a mother. I love every second of it even those trying moments. I was scared when I found out I was having a baby. I had graduated college 4 months before. I hadn't been able to find a real job. I took job in a call center. My relationship was ending with her father whom I had been with for over 2 years. My grandfather was dying. (My grandfather stepped up as a father many times in my life.) I was battling so much depression from all of those events. Then I found out I was pregnant on December 30, 2003. (December 30th is Mike's birthday. God works in mysterious ways.) My grandpa died on January 4, 2004. I lost my job because I took the time off for the funeral and to be with my family. The company had a no fault so many days missed and you are let go. So I was jobless, lost my grandpa, and my relationship was in ruins with the father of my unborn baby. My mom said it would be okay; and that I could move in with her and she would help me out. She and I have not always seen eye to eye, but when I need her the most she is always there. I was scared to death but there was no option but to have Gabrielle. I don't believe in abortion. And I could never do adoption. I knew that this was part of God's plan for me even if I didn't know how it would all work out. Plus from the moment I knew I was pregnant I loved her. I knew she was a girl because I always thought I wanted a boy. So I knew God would be funny and give me a girl. I am so glad He did.
Gabrielle had been the best blessing God has given to me. Because of Gabrielle I renewed my walk with God. Because of Gabrielle I become a healthier person, a better person. I have more patience, more compassionate, more wisdom. Everyday I thank God for the blessing of my daughter. I hear too often, "I can't wait until my kids are out of the house." I think those people have issues. This time goes by so fast. I swear it was just yesterday that I found out I was having her. I treasure the precious time I have with her as a child because before I know it she will be grown with a daughter of her own. So I will spend these years teaching her life's important lessons.
I also have to say that I am beyond blessed that God knew the master plan. He knew that I would find a meaningful job helping others. That I would find a church family. That I would reconnect with a college friend who turned out to be my soul mate. He also redefined all thoughts I had on step-parents. Gabrielle and I are truly blessed to have Mike.
Today after church and my daughter's baptism, we went down to Sugar Creek Reserve. We hiked, climbed trees, and enjoyed this beautiful day. I am so blessed. My life isn't perfect. I struggle with pain daily. I have issues that need to be worked out with people. I have my problems, but I have more blessings than troubles. What more could you ask for?
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